When we begin to pursue our dreams, I believe there are three types of women we need to be a part of our tribe,
The Light At the End of the Tunnel
The Fire Under Our Butt
The Candle in the Dark
Let me explain:
The Light at the End of the Tunnel is the woman who is a little older than us. She is ahead a few "seasons of life" of whatever season we are currently in. This is a woman who has seen and survived a lot of crap. She is a woman who is able to speak honestly about her own mistakes and comforts us as we navigate our own. "Oh honey, " she will say with her hand on our shoulder, "I did that too. It was a mess but I learned a lot. You will be fine." This is a woman who has taken risks and has seen some of her own dreams fulfilled but nevertheless, has not stopped dreaming. She is our "light at the end of the tunnel" - the marker of our destination. You can find her in your own family (an aunt or grandmother) or in church or even in an online community. She is out there and she will be delighted if you ask her to help light the pathway of your dream.
The Fire Under Our Butt is the woman who is pursuing a dream similar to our own. She is the writer friend who is also trying to knock out her first book proposal... or the neighbor who also bakes and is trying to launch an online bakery. She is the woman you have met at a conference and instantly clicked with. "Hey," she texts you, "Do you want to meet up once a month and keep each other accountable to our dream?" This woman becomes the fire under your butt because her active steps towards her dream will motivate you to take active steps in your dream. She will share resources that she has discovered and you will do the same for her. The ONLY way you will find this woman is if YOU start to share your dreams with others.
The Candle in the Dark is the woman who is excited for your dream even though it is not her dream. She is the friend who shows up to your first art show (after years of not lifting a single paint brush) and brings your favorite yellow roses. She is the woman who asks you, "How is your dream going? Tell me more about it!" She is the one that you call when you feel like the dream will never happen. In a gentle but firm tone, she reminds you, "Your dream WILL happen. Stop doubting yourself." This is a friend who you have allowed to speak frankly to you in the hard times. She is the candle in the dark, reminding you that no matter what obstacles may come our way, hope and possibility still remain.
Can you identify who these women are in your life right now? Send them a note/text/ gift to thank them for being so important to your journey! If you cannot identify who these women are, it may be time to think about HOW you can cultivate these types of friendships in your life. It may require stepping out of your comfort zone or to think outside of the box.
If you are feeling very alone as you pursue your dream, feel fee to send me an email! I would love to hear about it!
We need each other as we walk out our personal mission and calling. Even Jesus chose 12 men to walk with Him as He carried out His mission and purpose on earth. This should encourage us to do the same.
Your friend, another candle in the dark,
Noelle is a researcher, speaker, and podcaster. She is the podcast producer/host for Friending Podcast and is a regular co-host for the podcast, Slices of Life. She lives in North Jersey with her hot husband and two wild children. She is a big fan of Constant Comment Tea, the Oscars, and Lesley Knope.
Noelle is passionate about helping women empower women through the art of friendship.
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