How Our Friends Help Us Make Our Dreams Come True

  "A true friend is somebody who can make us do what we can." Ralph Waldo Emerson

       Have you ever had a dream in your heart, so big that to carry it through felt impossible? Would you be surprised to know that your friends have big dreams that feel impossible in their hearts too? 


    I interviewed a woman who shared with me that one of her dreams was to become a singer-songwriter. In her early twenties, she became pregnant and was a single mother for years before meeting her now husband. Together, they had three more children and for most of her thirties, she had at least one child in diapers. When she turned forty,  she wondered if it was too late to get back to writing music.  Through the years, she had tinkered on her guitar and wrote a song or two but she had never played before an audience. Her friend encouraged her to play at an open mic night at the coffee shop in town. She laughed at the idea and told her friend, "My days of music are over!"

    The next morning, her friend showed up with a packet of new guitar strings and a note that said, "Your days of music haven't expired. Music is eternal. Start playing."  

    With this encouragement, she began to write and sing. Six months later, the singer-songwriter woman called her friend to say, "This Saturday, I am going to play at the open mic night at the coffee shop in town." Before she could ask, her friend interrupted, "I'll be there and I'll a bring a fan club."

   Just as she promised, her friend was at the open mic night with a large fan club waiting to hear this singer-songwriter's debut. This friend gathered several mutual friends to attend the open mic to show their support. They brought flowers and signs and applauded with whistles and loud hollers after the singer-songwriter  played before an audience for the very first time.

    "What moved me," the singer-songwriter said, with tears in her eyes, "is that this was not her dream but she carried it as if it were her own."



1. They know the song in our heart.

    Joan Chittister shares this beautiful quote in her book, "The Friendship of Women: The Hidden Tradition of the Bible":

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can it sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

    If we have spent consistent time with our friend, we will know what she likes to do. One of my friends loves to cook lavished meals for her family. I know that one of her dreams is to write a cookbook. When I call her on a snow day, I know to always ask, "What is on your menu?" With great joy and detail, she describes to me what she is cooking. I know that cooking is a song in heart. 

Our friends know the song in our heart too. In the midst of our busyness or even a season of self doubt, they are able to say, “Hey! Do you thing! Do what you wanted to do! Don’t forget about that song in your heart!”

2. They know the journey we have been on.

     They know the unique path we have walked. They know what has broken our heart and what has been our greatest joy. They know who has been our best support and who always seems to make us feel small. They know our journey which means they have an important perspective that is helpful in carrying hour dream.   

 Here’s the thing:   When we know both the song in our friend's heart and the journey our friend has travelled,  we are then well equipped and qualified to help carry their dream too. The question is: Our we?

There is something truly wonderful when two friends cheer each other as they each pursue their dream. The world seems to be a little bit brighter because more humans are becoming who they were always meant to be. How often we forget the gift we can give in friendship in simply just believing in one another and voicing that belief!

Your friend,